Архив конференции Fidonet HUMOR.FILTERED,
нагло упертый мной с http://hf.kru.to/
(координатор - Евгений Плисс), и переведенный в html :-)
- HUMOR.FILTERED ---------------------------------------------- HUMOR.FILTERED - From : Michael Bravo 2:5030/0 08 Feb 94 15:47:48 Subj : ностальгия, хакеры и Юникс -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hello All! Author : Russell Street <russells@ccu1.aukuni.ac.nz> VAX Raphosdy ------------ Is this the real login:? Is it a trap? Caught on a terminal No escape from the committee Open your mail Look up to the skies And see... I'm just a poor hacker, I need no sympathy Because I'm easy come, easy go Little high, little low Hit me where the wind blows, Doesn't really matter to me, to me Momma, just killed a VAX Type a command into the shell, Hit RETURN, now it's dead Momma, my account had just begun And now I've gone and thrown it all away Momma, didn't mean to make you crash If I'm not back on this time tomorrow Hack on, hack on as if nothing really matters Too late -- my time has come Sent shivers down my spine Bodies aching all the time Goodbye everybody, I've got to go Got to leave you all behind and face the truth Momma, (every way the wind blows) I don't wanna kicked off, I sometimes wish I'd never logged on at all UNIX* [To the tune of _Money_ by Pink Floyd] ---- UNIX, it's a gas; grab that VAX with both hands and make it crash. UNIX, it's a hit; Don't give me that PC DOS Bullshit. I'm into well benchmarked POSIX Open Systems I think I need a RISC chip. UNIX, jmp back; I'm all niced now pop your frame off of my stack. --- *UNIX is a trademark of AT&T UNIX Man (to The Beatles' "Nowhere Man") -------- He's a real UNIX Man Sitting in his UNIX LAN Making all his UNIX .plans For nobody Knows the blocksize from 'du' Cares not where /dev/null goes to Isn't he a bit like you And me? UNIX Man, don't worry It's the tube that's blurry UNIX Man The new kernel boots, just like you had planned He's as wise as he can be Programs in lex, yacc and C UNIX Man, can you help me At all? UNIX Man, please listen My printout is missin' UNIX Man The wo-o-o-orld is your 'at' command Title : The Alternative Wall Original : The Wall Group : Pink Floyd Author : ? Intro : Here's a set of pseudosongs which is the result of several long drunken nights talking on a bulletin board between London & Aberystwyth (220+ miles apart)... circa 1988. Song : The Alternative Wall:- Established by:- Anarchy, Atropos, White, Roadrunner>>>++>>, & Giant Hogweed. Nobody On --------- I got keyboard corns on my fingers, I got a Ethernet Pad for a brain, I got a VDU to prop up my mortal remains. My programs always fail, I got a strong urge to MAIL But I got no-one to MAIL to, MAIL to, MAIL to.. Oh, babe, when I send down the phone, There's still nobody on... The Alternative Wall, Part Two. Does anybody here remember DEC? Remember how the manual Was useless to me In every way. UNIX, what has become of you? Can any other O/S be quite as slow as you... The Alternative Wall, Part Three. The Trial --------- Good Morning, ROOT, your honour, The dump will plainly show the user who now stands before you Was caught red-handed in the system Crudely hacking in a truly vicious nature This will not do! CALL THE LOGFILE! "I always said he'd come to no good didn't I, ROOT, your honour, If they let me have my way I'd have him banned from the VAX! But my hands were tied, The bleeding hearts and artists Not to mention the Dave Prices Wouldn't let me throw him off!" -- Dedicated to Atropos The Wanderer. The Alternative Wall, Part Four. The UNIX Login Software ----------------------- Is there anybody out there? (repeat ad nauseam) The Alternative Wall, Part Five. One of My Hacks --------------- Log onto the system On that lurid green screen You'll find there's no response! Don't look so frightened, this is just a passing crash, One of my bad hacks! Would you like to watch TV, Well, that's no use to me I want to watch you squirm As you try to get logged on! Do you want to call the OPS, Do you think it's time I stopped? Why are you running away? The Alternative Wall, Part Six. Filled Up Spaces / What Shall We Do Now? ---------------------------------------- What shall we use to trash The filled up spaces on the archive tape? How should I hack and leave no traces, How shall the system completely fall? The Alternative Wall, Part Seven. Uncomfortably Numb ------------------ Hello, is there anybody on here? I'm here but can you see me? Is there anyone at home? C'mon now, I hear that MIST is down, I can ease the pain, maybe bring it up again. Relax, I need some information first, Just the basic facts, have you hacked the system Snurt? There is no shell, your call is clearing, The distant chips smoke on the breadboard, You are only coming through off pads, Your fingers move but I can't see what you're typing. When I was a child I caught a virus, My filebase swelled just like two balloons Now I've got that feeling once again, I can't explai(core dumped), you would not understand, This is not how I am. I have become uncomfortably numb. The Alternative Wall, Part Eight. In a Flash ---------- So ya Thought ya Might like to Go to the show To feel the thrill of board hacking, That luminescent glow. I've got some bad news for you, sunshine OPS not around, 'cos Node 5 is down, And they sent us along, they've gone to the bar, And we're going to find out who you guys Really are. Have we got any oppos on the system tonight? Grep 'em up against the wall. There's one on Bullet, He don't look right to me, Grep him up agaist the wall. That one's called Badger, And that one's Tyrone, Who let all this riffraff on their own; There's one smoking a joint and Another with sandals? If I had my way I'd have all of you shot. Waiting for the Sun (by Jamie Mason, to the Doors tune of the same name) ------------------- At first flash of daylight, We're still hacking in C. Sitting there Bashing one last Bug Waiting for the Sun, Waiting for the Sun, Waiting for the Sun. Can't you feel it, Now that work is due, That it's time to Fight for some CPU Waiting for the Sun, Waiting for the Sun, Waiting for the Sun. Waiting for the Sun. Waiting... Waiting... Waiting... Waiting... Waiting... Waiting... Waiting... Waiting... Waiting for Make is Such a bore. Waiting for a.out to Stop dumping core... Waiting for some cycles All day long. Waiting for adb to tell me what went wrong. This is the strangest Bug I've ever known. Can't you feel it, Now that work is due, That it's time to fight For some CPU Waiting for the Sun, Waiting for the Sun, Waiting for the Sun. Waiting for the Sun. Gateway To Heaven There's a lady who knows All the systems and nodes And she's byteing a Gateway to Heaven She telnets there, she knows All the ports have been closed With a nerd she can get Files she came for Woohoohoo Woo Hoo Hoo HooHoo And she's byteing a Gateway to Heaven There's an motd But she wants to be sure Cos she knows sometimes hosts have Two domains In a path by the NIC There's a burdvax that pings Sometimes all of our flames are cross-posted Woohoohoo Woo Hoo Hoo HooHoo And she's byteing a Gateway to Heaven And it's processed by root Unix Labs will reboot NCR will then listen to reason And a prompt will respawn For those yet to logon And the networks will echo much faster Woohoohoo Woo Hoo Hoo HooHoo And she's byteing a Gateway to Heaven If there's a lookup in your netstat don't be .alarmed now it's just a pinging from the link queen Yes there are two routes you can type in but in the long run there's still time to change the net you're on (I hope so!) And as we find stuff to download We ftp and we chmod There was a sysadm we know Who changed the server to her own She had root privs and she used chown She hacked out on the DDN And if you tail her stdin Then you will find what you had lost And get it back with cpio To be a hack and not to scroll... And she's byteing a Gateway to Heaven In the RAM where I was forked, lived a ROM, who sailed the C... And he told, me of his life, in the Berkeley, 4.3... We all live in the Berkeley 4.3, Berkeley 4.3, Berkeley 4.3. We all live in the Berkeley 4.3, Berkeley 4.3, Berkeley 4.3. ((c) White the Wizard productions Ltd, 1987) Cycles For Nothing (i want my i want my i want my X-MP!) Now look at them yo-yo's that's the way you do it You run the fortran on the X-MP That ain't hackin' that's the way you do it Cycles for nothin', gigabits for free Now that ain't hackin' that's the way you do it Lemme tell ya them guys ain't dumb Maybe Monte Carlo on a three-quark system Maybe design a little neutron bomb We gotta install microwave uplinks Custom fuzzballs for everyone We gotta link up DDS circuits BERT and loopback tests to run See the kid professor with the blue jeans and the necktie Yeah buddy that's his own hair That kid professor got his Nobel prize now That kid professor he's a millionaire We gotta install microwave uplinks Custom fuzzballs for everyone We gotta link up DDS circuits BERT and loopback tests to run I shoulda stuck to writing in fortran I shoulda kept that old 029 Look at that output, he got it stacked up to the ceilin' I bet he ain't read one line And in there, what's that? A hundred postdocs? Bangin' on the keyboards like some chimpanzees That ain't hackin' that's the way you do it Cycles for nothin', gigabits for free We gotta install microwave uplinks Custom fuzzballs for everyone We gotta link up DDS circuits BERT and loopback tests to run by Matt Crawford Software for Nothing ==================== by: Brent CJ Britton With appoligies to Mark Knopfler. I waaaant my.. I waaaant my... I waaaant my C-R-T...... Now look at them hackers, That's the way ya' do it. Ya' play with mem'ry that you cannot see. Now that ain't workin, that's the way ya do it. Get your software for nothing and your chips for free. Now that ain't workin, gotta CPU-it. Let me tell ya, them guys ain't dumb. Maybe crash the system with your little finger, Maybe crash the system with your thumb. We got to install micro-data-bases, Gotta make things run like a breeeeze. We gotta help these foreign students, We gotta help these mindless E.E.'s... The little Hacker with the Pepsi and the Munchos: Yeah, buddy, don't like to SHARE... The little Hacker got his own compiler, The little guy don't change his underwear. We got to install the latest debugger, Under budget, and optimiiiiiiized. We got to have more muddy-black coffee, We got a green glow in our eyyyyyyes... I shoulda' learned to play with Pascal. I shoulda' learned to program some. Look at that drive, I'm gonna stick it on the channel, Man, it's better than the old one... And who's up there, what's that? Beeping noises? He's bangin on the keyboard like a chimpanze. Oh that aint workin, that's the way ya do it, Get your software for nothin', get your chips for free. Tap my wire (the more's) ~~~~~~~~~~ You know that I would be untrue You know that I would be a 'foo' If I was to say to you We couldn't hack ourselves to root Come on hackers tap a wire Come on hackers tap a wire Try to set the mode-bits higher The time to sit and watch is gone No time to linger in the shell Try to make crack-programs run Yes we will make the tty's bell Come on hackers tap a wire Come on hackers tap a wire Try to set the mode-bits higher /\\/\\ike --- * Origin: Двигаться дальше... (2:5030/0)
